Self-Care Isn’t Selfish

Self-Care Isn't Selfish

I just finished a bit of awesomesauce in session today, and I wanted to come and share something a little different with you too here on the blog.

Usually, I like to post my takeaways from guidance received from Spirit, but today I thought I’d record you a little video message. 

Nothing fancy, super simple, but total love from my heart to yours.

There is a loose transcript for you below. 

We can become very caught up in our worry about other people’s reactions and other people’s upset and other people’s stuff.

We take other people into consideration before even ourselves. It’s almost like it’s our responsibility to make sure everybody else is okay and everybody else’s needs are okay, first. And if everybody else is not okay, it’s even up to us to make it better.

We want to make sure everyone’s okay so we feel we are free to have time for us. To take care of us, to honor what we want to do. Self-care time for us does not come first, it comes last if it comes at all. 

And I gotta say, that’s like taking the long way around to your own needs being met.

Some of us struggle with needing to make sure everything else and everyone else is okay before we can have time for ourselves. We may feel selfish when thinking of putting ourselves first. We may feel guilty…

But seriously!

Self-Care isn’t selfish. Taking care of you FIRST is a priority. 

I sometimes run into that feeling too. You are not alone in that. 

In the mornings, I want to have my hour of coffee time and meditation and Course in Miracles practice and I like to just goof around and post pictures to my Instagram stories and stuff like that.

And I can feel a part of me feeling like I should be making breakfast for everyone and I should be packing lunches for everyone and doing all these things like laundry and the cleaning too. And THEN I can have time for me. 

Each of us can have this thing where we worry about taking care of everybody else, first, and then it’ll be our turn.

But the thing is, if we follow that logic, it will never be our turn!

Choosing to focus our energy in that way will just leave us feeling more and more worried about everything else that’s going wrong, and eventually, you come to see you can’t relax when stuff’s going on out in the world.

You can’t relax because you’ve trained the nervous system to be on high alert for everyone and everything else. 

So, we could break this cycle. We could. We could learn to choose to practice honoring us and being selfish. (Consider the term selfish to mean being of the self first!)

I love how number one husband says, 

You have to be selfish before you can prosper.

All of us worry about being selfish and we feel guilty at times too. But when we’re in that energy, remember that we’re not prospering. And prospering can mean anything you want it to mean – you want to take better care of yourself, earn more money, you want to launch a business idea, you want to just have your self-care time, your crafting time. Maybe you want to have time to make your home more beautiful and pleasing for you. 

You have to be selfish or it’s never going to happen.

And if you’re always feeling guilty about making time for you, spending money on you… then you cannot prosper. You are literally saying to life, I do not matter! We gotta think about this in a new way. 

You matter.

You’re going to take time for you.

You’re going to make time for you.

You’re not going to clean the house and make all the lunches and mow the lawn before you get that time in for you, you’re going to take it FIRST.

Let’s try it and see how it is for you. See what your own benefits were that you found.

And for those of you that this is really really easy for and if you’re listening to this like, I already know how to do this, Robin! Then please help somebody else out. Is there somebody you know who regularly speaks from their guilt and they’re taking responsibility for everyone else and feeling like it’s their job? If you see it, help them out because they think that’s right, they’re doing the right thing. So please help them out, okay?

Let’s be sparklers for each other. Let’s help each other, let’s share the love. Share this post on with somebody else so then we can all together and be free and enjoy our beautiful lives, and have a cup of tea and have some fun and make art and have fun and… woot! picture all the things you want to do 🙂

So, may that serve you today, beloved.  And always, I’d love to hear from you if there’s another topic I could speak to for you. 

Sending a hug and lots of love!


Self-Care isn't selfish