You are a dynamic manifestor and you’re always creating. Always manifesting dynamically.
Whether you’re being intentional or not! You are STILL manifesting. And it can take time to see the results in your life.
When you consider the process of creating life and giving birth or the growth of a seed into a tree, none of that happens overnight. But I notice how our nature is to plant the seeds and then move on to the next thing. It’s a beautiful practice to intentionally choose to see the fruits and also remember back to the time where the idea was being born, the longing was being realized and the manifestation was set into motion.
Think about how this is for you. What are you doing today, what are you doing right now? What are you looking forward to in the next many months? And what was happening for you, a year ago? Can you see the fruits of your labor? Can you see what you’ve been creating? And for those of us who feel we seem to only go backward in our journey, or we stay very stagnant in our journey, can you see that this has also been so much of your focus that you’ve been planting those seeds?
🎧 Listen to Episode 66: Reflections, Year of Kindness, #lifeincolour
This episode is also available wherever you enjoy podcasts or downloadable here:
My loosely edited session notes including time stamps. plus all links, quotes, books, and movies mentioned are below
My notes from this show:
In today’s episode, lots of topics like self-care being selfish and the opinion of other people and how to handle the nosey Parker’s in your life, plus reflecting back on the whole year. Our inspiration is from a poet who doesn’t always know it and we’ll have a letter from the #lifeincolor. All this and more come grab a cup of yum yum and meet me here.
Well Hello Beloved, guess who it is. It’s me, Robin, back with another awesome heart sparkling episode of tea with Robin Episode 66. Welcome back to the podcast. I appreciate you being here again, there are so many things you could be listening to right now and I appreciate receiving this time together with you. And if it’s your first time here. Hi, this is me, Robin. I hope this is a great place of abundance joy inspiration and light for you. And you come back again and again.
So welcome welcome welcome. How is the weather in your heart today? How are you doing, for real? Are you here, in this moment, present and accounted for breathing, relaxing appreciating? If not, it’s an easy remedy, you can just stand here with me for a moment, put a hand on your heart. Even if you’re on the subway, nobody will know what you’re doing. Take a deep breath and find your heart, find your feet. Those are two good places to center in on when you’re wanting to know how you are. Let’s take a deep breath together. It’s good. How about one more.
Always, my prayer is that you realize you are in power, and in control of the weather in your heart, of how the day is going for you of the decisions you are making the obligations you’re fulfilling. You are in charge, and responsible in a way that means you can change the course of your journey today, anytime you want any anytime. Yeah, so good.
Well, over here. It’s a beautiful day, it’s been grey, November is can be a bit gray in Chicago. It’s beautiful, though, due to our freaky weather the leaves are still largely on all the trees, and they’re yellow…they’re that fall color, so they’re like frozen in time. And then there’s a lot of snow on the ground too. Beautiful.
And I’m doing really well. Some of you might know I had some more oral surgery last week, I know I’ve been talking about the dentist a bit. And for those of you adverse dental fearbanites… I get it!
I have done so much healing and growth around my own dental stuff that I’m in such a different place with it.
I lovingly care for my teeth and my body and that I am just grateful to be able to go and have good care and get things taken care of.
I think a lot of us can feel embarrassed about our teeth. If we have quote-unquote bad teeth and we can feel ashamed, but the thing I wanted to say is that too is a choice. It’s a decision we’re making.
You can also choose to look at it like you’re not always in control of what your body chooses to do, and the thing you are in control of is your own self-care, your own mental attitude and your, the love you apply or don’t apply to your body and your mind and your energy.
I lovingly show up and take care of myself, and I feel proud of that because I can remember a time when that wasn’t the case, you know. And some of us just, we really need to get it, that there’s nothing to be ashamed of but choosing to be ashamed is a choice. Choosing to feel those feelings is a choice we can also choose to release.
And honestly, what other people decide to heap on us in a story of shame, like let’s say you do go to the dentist and the dentist is like, oh god, what have you been eating? What are you doing?! You still don’t have to let that in it’s the truth that could still be a choice. So let’s just keep choosing again.
My own history. There have been a lot of accidents, and yeah, I mean, my parents would tell the story that they put Coca Cola and my bottle, when I was still bottle feeding 😉 So I feel like it isn’t all my fault how my teeth got this way – some of it I couldn’t help… but I can take full responsibility for my love and self-care and even my dentist is like, you have amazing self-care your gums look good your teeth look good, I can tell you’re doing everything you need to do. And that’s so great. Maybe that’s really something to take away from this experience. So, I am healing very well still wearing ice packs and hot packs and not really back to work yet next week, I’ll be back to work.
I’ve been reflecting a lot this week and this is what I want to talk to you about today. I’m not such a fan of January 1, anything, but I am right now in that mode of looking back on the year and appreciating and noting, what I would like to be shifting. And that’s what we’re going to talk about coming up. But first, you know what’s coming. Don’t just. Did you bring a couple of yum yum?
Well, I have two things going on here. A delicious cup of coffee, still drinking my favorite Trader Joes, the morning wake up blend. I love that one. With a little coconut milk and heavy whipping cream, I mix the two together in a big mason jar and use it. It keeps like that for about two weeks, so just pour a little out into a cute little milk pitcher and pour that in with a little sea salt. So I’ve got that going on in my favorite mug. From a favorite friend. And I have a big jar of calendula tea.
Going to the dentist and being afraid of getting dental work.
Healing tea. Herbs are really something when you have physical ailments going on, it’s so easy I know to reach for Advil, etc. And I’m a fan of Advil I’m taking a lot of different things right now because there are blessings in western medicine and eastern medicine to, you don’t have to just be all or nothing. I love calendula tea, and the homeopathy of that for healing tissue and muscle, if you’ve had anything where there’s been an injury to the bone or just work being done calendula tea. It’s lovely. And you can rinse with it, but you can also just drink it and then so I’ve got that. This is the longest cheers in history or, is anyone keeping time. I have a feeling it’s a long one, but it’s important, all of this. So, did you already finish your tall cup of yum yum from Starbucks in that time? Well cheers to us and cheers to this beautiful journey and cheers to you. You are lovely and such a treat to spend this time with. Cheers.
And I like to say a special shout out to my friend Megan who just became a listener on the podcast and had a birthday few weeks ago Welcome aboard.
I started listening to your podcast at number 11, and I’m in love with today’s episode I’m incredibly grateful for your energy and I’m finally making a choice to believe in myself and my future. I’m smiling and loving myself more and more each day and trusting myself more and forever thankful.
Thank you too, Megan, happy birthday.
It’s amazing what the journey can bring to us with a little openness and willingness, you know. So cheers to you.
Nosy Parkers and their projections. How to deal with it.
So today, I was mentioning that I’ve spent the week in my recovery phase, looking at past creations past events past things and kind of casting forward what I would love from here. And also, being a loving witness to my own stories of dental work and things and being a witness to the way you guys have been so loving to and some people have stories that they project on to me that are not true and, as always, I have to say, I probably mentioned that a lot but it’s always something that’s an interesting practice to do because really, when somebody talks to you like your experience is what they’re saying it is, it can feel tricky, especially if they’re assuming you’re all like broken down and crazy and really having a hard time or terrified or whatever you know we all are.
It’s such a good reminder that we are all assuming we know what’s happening for someone else. And the key is we’re making that assumption based on how we’re doing and who we are and how we are so it would be so nice to realize, Oh, you know, I’m feeling this way and feeling these feelings and making these assumptions based on my own experience. And instead of just assuming that the other person is feeling the exact way that you would be in that situation, consider that this is a completely different person with their own experience, and you don’t know what’s going on for them.
And this is such a timely reminder because you’re going into the holiday season and more exposure to other people and you might like to just percolate on that how can this support you in your own journey.
I’ve decided I don’t need to defend my experience, and I don’t need to explain it more fully to people who don’t seem to get it. I really don’t need to talk about it other than to say, I’m taking good care of myself it’s going well. And if you follow me on Instagram Stories here’s what I’m eating today. I use cute animals as my standards for how my face is looking. It’s fun.
And it’s maybe not a big deal if people choose to extrapolate that you are not doing well, that’s their deal, you know, so keep that in mind as you go forward and how would it be just to consider what you would love who you truly are, how you want to treat yourself, you know, all of that, and stay out of the drama that you know some people choose to introduce.
Watch your temptation to apologize for showing up as you are, for saying how it is. If you notice their need to make it okay for you, patronizing, pat you on the back and tell you it’s not going to be like this forever and all this stuff and you notice it upsets you…what if you just didn’t need to respond? That’s so many times how I choose to do it. I don’t respond to it. I can feel the intention of the love, and I say thank you for that but it doesn’t mean that’s my experience, and people are free to keep assuming that forever if they want to. It’s not your problem. It’s not my problem, and deciding not to see it, deciding not to speak to it, deciding not to react to it is such a advanced healing skill if you ask me.
It’s very much when the Course in Miracles talks about illusion or when in Buddhism they talk about Maya or in the Bible it talks about the darkness. Why respond to the Maya the illusion the darkness, the kookiness Why get into that dance with anybody over anything? Since it’s not real, why not give it a wide berth and stay with your heart.
If it’s somebody close in your life, if it’s somebody who really matters, and this is a repeated thing, of course, you’ll say something. I’ve definitely had that experience where somebody in my close circle will say things to me that aren’t true and I’ll say yeah but that was five years ago. Yeah, but really I don’t even remember that being the case, I can’t even remember a time where that was the case or, you know, wow, that was a long time ago. You don’t need to start a conflict or a drama situation. You don’t need to start a fight with somebody, you don’t need to be like, why can’t you ever see me as I truly am?!!! You can say, Oh yeah, I remember that too. That was like six years ago, I was really struggling with that.
Stay out of the fray, stay in the light. What did the Munchkins say in The Wizard of Oz
Step into the sun.
Step into the light.
We’re out of the woods.
We’re out of the dark.
We’re out of the night.
Some of that stuff is just such a choice because if you choose to answer it, you are joining with it… you are stepping into the night, into the dark, into the woods. And that means you get everything that goes with it. The scary kooky noises and the fearful feelings and all of that so staying in the light. Such a beautiful practice instead of identifying with the old story.
I keep thinking this is important for you going home for the holidays, visiting with friends and family for the holidays. And I promise we are going to keep talking about that. Going forward, for sure. There’s so much to say about that. But for today just wanted to say that. And, again, thank you to each of you with your love and your sparkles and I know a few of you wrote me that you did read the post I mentioned last week sell crazy someplace else we’re all stocked up here, where I talked a bit about my own experience, some of it anyway.
As much as I appreciate your love and kindness, I always want to remind us both that our own reaction of love, or pity or fear or upset or outrage is significant for our own history too.
Also, some of you that I know personally are the most amazing moms that I never had. So, I know when there are those strong reactions too it’s just because you’re not that kind of a) You’re not offering parenting in that same way that it was offered to me, and b) I thank you for showing up in your life, strong and empowered. It’s amazing and loving. Thank you.
Reflecting back on the year and my trip to Bali one year ago today
So I was saying I spent the week looking at my creations just like the last whole year and the wildest thing ever happened, which was this morning I got up and I was looking at one year ago today, I use Google Photos. I forget what they call it pictures or, I don’t know, but Google Photos, and I, at the top, you can look at one year ago today, and it just shows you everything. It also will give you a few days on either side of that so it’s like any picture you took, which I love to see your Facebook memories, is nice too but it only shows you the day you actually posted something and these are just all the photos in the raw unedited. It’s beautiful. So, you know what I was doing a year ago today. I was flying to Bali, I was getting ready to fly to Bali.
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Those of you who have been listening. That would be Episode 16, and Episode 17. Wow. That it blew me away. I saw a bunch of pictures of what I was packing and the books I was taking and revisited the post I posted that day. I saw my flight, my airplane, my airline seat, which I remember, I, I had such a reasonable ticket. I flew to Bali for like $888 I think that was still cracked me up eight. And because of that I could not pick a seat, like at all. I was in the back of the bag, I had the best flight, you can listen back if you want to hear it. Everything went so well but I was looking at the food I was eating on the plane and I didn’t let myself go forward. I thought it would be fun. That every day, I would receive my Bali photos and my journal, I’ll get my journal out and read for that day, which is, I am so excited about that it is so cool. This experience, you know, I know a lot of us do stuff like this we go away on an amazing adventure, and then we come home, and it’s over.
And I wanted to tell you that sometimes the year is necessary in order for us to see the fruit. And it’s just a natural process. When you consider nature when you consider seasons. When you consider
the process of creating life and giving birth. None of that is overnight. The growth of a seed into a tree, you know none of that is overnight over and done with. And our nature is such that we are on to the next thing. Sometimes so quickly. That’s a beautiful practice to intentionally choose to see the fruits.
And also remember back to the time where the idea was being born, the longing was being realized and the manifestation was set into motion, you know, and remembering back, that was a time that number one had just been diagnosed with cancer, about eight months. And there was, we were waiting, it was like down to the two weeks of the trip we were waiting for some test results to come back, that would have meant. I would have stayed home, I wouldn’t have gone, and there was a lot of discussion there. And then, I remember privately feeling like that’s what matters to me the most. I’ll be home to help him and that feeling. Should I stay or should I go, it was so clear to me that I would be so willing to let go to stay with him, and it all turned out just fine. How a lot of his journey has been like you have a little worry and then everything is just fine.
So off I went, you know, many of us believe so strongly in our problems or problems, and the dilemma of the day or the dilemma of the month, or at that time for us it had been about almost a year, eight months and choosing to see what we want, choosing to create what we want, learning that again and again that what we expect is delivered back to us tenfold. Because we’re calling it in. So, of course, it’s going to be delivered to us and making these choices to step in more fully to what we know to be true to what we know to be aligned for us in the highest light.
The truth we know is true for us, even though it’s not true for anybody else we may know, even though we’re on the leading edge as Abraham Hicks would say, with all that we think and know in our circle. Still holding on to that truth still holding on to that knowledge and letting it move us, is where it’s at. Right, that’s what I’m talking about.
So, this period of choosing for you think about this as I’m talking about this for me. Think about how this is for you. What are you doing today, what are you doing right now? What are you looking forward to in the next many months? And what was happening for you, a year ago? Can you see the fruits of your labor? Can you see what you’ve been creating some of us who feel we seem to only go backward in our journey, or we stay very stagnant in our journey? Can you see that this has also been your focus so much of your focus?
I work with a lot of friends who are reporting in on the shame data, the state of their weight, the state of their finances. The state of their eating habits their consuming habits and what is that even that’s not a journey, looking at yourself, deeply and completely as a being who came to shine the light in the world to have certain experiences in the world. It’s a very different thing. So, If you’re stuck in a yo-yo cycle, feeling like it’s all about how you never make any progress or you’re always going backward or you’re just stuck, you’re stuck, you stuck. I’m not judging that I’m just saying that’s been the focus, and that will continue to be the result,
realizing you’re a dynamic manifestor and you’re always creating what you want sets you free. And you can choose. So what do you choose, you can choose today to bless the mess. If you feel it’s been a mess. The last year has been immense you know not everybody does I’m just saying you know if you feel it has been.
You can choose today to bless the mess to bless the story you’ve been telling, and to begin again. Because again, we are always manifesting and creating what we want. By what we’re focusing on what we’re talking about what we’re choosing to see. And many of us believe so strongly in our problems that they’re the only reality we can see. And just keep remembering me saying to you that what you expect back what you expect is delivered to you. What you’re calling in is always delivered to you, and telling that story is calling it in. So, help yourself, flip the switch to, what would you love to call forward going forward. It’s that simple. The Course in Miracles says there’s no order of difficulty in miracles one is not harder than another. But you’re believing makes it so.
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And if you’re digging on this there was another episode I found as I was looking back to my Bali chronicles, on the podcast episode 21. I was sharing some very simple examples about manifesting Yahtzee over and over and over playing Yahtzee with number one by the fire and a couple of other fun examples where you end up calling in exactly what you’ve been focusing on and how can we use this inspiration to take ourselves even higher in our lives.
What I know for sure is the molecules of creation are always around you, the molecules of abundance love creation, power, always around you.
Picture yourself as a being in the world with all that invisible stuff we see in science, atoms and molecules, and stay in the flow of your imagination… see all that you’re wanting swimming around you energetically all the time. These molecules of love and support and encouragement and empowerment and manifesting abundance. It’s all around you.
We can choose to inhale energy in calling the love calling the inspiration calling the joy calling the delight. And exhale the old stuff. You can also choose to continue to call in your annoyance your frustration your story of boredom. Same old, same old. So, let’s choose. Let’s choose. People tell me in session, all the time, I can’t believe how much better I feel how easy it was to practice with you. I never thought of doing this for myself.
Will you practice? Will you become willing? It’s if you ask me it’s a courageous thing to say look, I’ve got 87 problems. Like I was saying to me last year. Going to Bali. I was like, look. Number one husband has cancer, and what kind of huh for a wife goes to Bali. This time, you know, and it, I thought it was so interesting because I tried to cancel this trip, and it was like my path was clear: Robin, you gotta go focus on you and live your life out loud go have your experience, and don’t use this as an opportunity to hold back your light. And number one was great. He was fine. He had a ball spending Thanksgiving elsewhere. Of course, I was going to be gone for Thanksgiving to which was so interesting first Thanksgiving I’ve probably missed in wow, a long time. So, what kind of miracles could we open ourselves to instead of aligning to the same same same same same? Call this in for you.
Is it really worth it to focus on your upset? Because you are ordering all the time. It’s like the cosmic restaurant, you’re ordering that dish. Are you sure. And it’s not that we can’t talk about upsetting things but we need a bigger more expanded view, one with compassion for everyone. Understanding we’re all on this journey.
So I thought I would just end by opening my journal to Bali day one, and read a little bit from there, and coming up, I’m going to read a poem I wrote. It’s the wildest thing how. Looking back, I can tell you that I did not open this journal for the year came home and put it in my travel bag but I have not cracked this journal yet. So here we go:
Bali, November 2018. So my flights were easy peasy. Just goes to show you all the worry for nothing. My practicing paid off. So now what do I want to practice? May my time be amazing and enjoyable. I’m very far from home. And that can be scary for sure, doing what I can to stay present with myself and not get freaked out about the expanse and the time ahead. I’m in a beautiful villa. I have air conditioning, which is good because it’s hot like you can’t imagine, and still I’m drinking tea. There are two big geckos in my room guardians, with the sweet song. I am grateful for the beauty and kind people with big smiles and delicious food. I am deliberately creating what’s happening in my life, and may what feels stuck or uncomfortable be healed. What do I wish for now?
And that’s it. So good right. I love it, I just wow it’s so inspiring and to realize that was the launch, the big-ticket thing I did one year ago. That trip at that time was a very big courageous movement. Stretching myself and choosing to be very intentional. It has created so many beautiful ripples in my life going forward.
And a year later, a whole year later, we’re going to Assisi Italy for a whole month, working over there living over there and I can see the seeds, having been planted in Bali, even though we never knew, even though we never talked about it. That’s how it begins.
So, all this to say, it pays to be intentional, and also to be patient and loving and welcoming about who you are and what you want, and stay faithful to that, over anything else. So cheers. May that serve you. I hope there were some good takeaways there for you.
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This week’s inspiration: To celebrate the coming year.
I thought I would read a poem, I wrote in Bali to celebrate the year to come. And I’d love to invite you, before I read this, to consider sitting down and writing your own announcement for what the coming year will be for you. Perhaps, trusting that nobody will read it. Nobody will see it. Nobody has to know. This is not an accountability exercise where people are going to shame you for eating muffins afterward or for falling off your diet or not joining the marathon or writing that book, this is just something you do for you.
Let this be a year of kindness — kindness of the selfish kind.
A year of love with bones. Let this be one that cherishes you above all else, the one that chooses to celebrate myself and do no harm.
Let this be the year of hooky and pajamas, of both going for it and not giving a sh*t, of letting go and changing your mind.
Kindness to embrace your inner wildling and let yourself howl.
The kindness to say yes and no and yes again, and then still be open to changing your mind.
Let this be the year to finally acknowledge the horrible hairy that’s been lurking in your closet, the one which keeps puffing its farty breath into the present moments… instead of looking for a bigger rock to stick it back under, let this be the year to set ourselves free of the tiresome and relentless, to look it squarely in the eye without running or smashing it down and saying hey, now’s the time let’s heal this kiddo. Let’s get some help.
Kindness which allows your broken heart to open and grieve and receive, even though doing that feels a little like dying.
Let this be the year of kindness where you choose yourself, above all else, a year to courageously know it is kind to show up in the hard places, because you are worthy and deserving of a life you feel proud to claim.
May this be the year of allowing your head to hit the pillow feeling proud and strong about the day you’ve had.
Kindness to return it all to sender–the bad advice, the judgy comments, the weird unexplainable happenings.
Kindness to rename yourself a freak of nature and a rock star all at once and to really really know what that means to you.
A year to learn the love map of your heart a little bit better.
To pursue any hobby you damn well please — even if it’s frivolous, even if a fifth-grader could do it, and especially because it doesn’t earn any money.
Kindness to love what you love and hate what you hate, and to not make everything so hard — even if it makes you sloppy, and the hyperlinks don’t work, and the commas are in all the wrong places.
Kindness to be a fool for love, and the wisdom to know, That’s the way I do it, and I really don’t need a reason.
Kindness to set the hostages of your heart free.
To roll with the punches and the changes.
And even the kindness that finds you doing the dishes, wishing someone well — even a sworn enemy, even the ones who betrayed you — because kindness has a greater impact than anything else your ego could ever scheme.
Heart open, light of my world, thank you for the awareness and the beauty of this coming year.
Yes, indeed. This will be the year of kindness. — Robin Hallett 11/2018
And so it is. Amen. And Whoa, and Hi, I swear that. Wow. I tell you what, I feel totally transformed just revisiting that kind of Can’t believe that’s been sitting there all this time so beautiful. So, May that serve you. And think about writing yourself a love poem, herald in this new year for you. What do you want it to be? That’s the biggest takeaway I can offer, make it something beautiful and special for you and dare to believe in yourself and your possibilities and even when the voice of the inner booger shows up, you can keep choosing.
Announcements this week:
So friends before I read today’s letter. I’d love to ask you if this has been a meaningful episode please share it on. Tell somebody else about it. What did it mean for you today? What did you receive? We’re about to have an amazing letter that’s probably going to just push the awesomesauce over the top, we’re worth it. I appreciate that even clicking those five stars while you’re listening. Because, how have you rated this episode today five stars? Always I appreciate a review on iTunes 🙂
And I wanted to say a special shout out for the sweetest message this week to two sparklers in my heart today, Susan, and Mary, thank you so much for sharing about the podcast, sharing what it means to you, and for receiving together. A beautiful mom and daughter duo. And I imagine you know how that would have been for me and my mom. Every now and then two sparklers will come to me and share about the episode and I feel like I’m receiving that experience on a whole new level.
For those of you moms and daughters out there, I thank you so much for that. And, yeah, cheers. So good to hear from you both. Thank you.
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What I love ❤️ When it’s sunset here, it’s rising there. The roosters sound the same as home. My adopted pet cat and the lizards she leaves. The energy of love that’s always rolling. Acceptance… it is what it is. Meeting new friends who are kindreds. Synchronicity – – too many to mention. Remembering again and again that there’s no such thing as being alone. XO. Robin P. S. Love! You! All is well. This is the view from my “hotel” – – it’s really a magical palace where you are always held in an essence of love and light and that’s no wishy woo woo, it’s simply for reals. There is such love in the service here, learning to receive on a whole new level. 😅🙏 Hope you’re doing wonderfully well!!
This week’s letter: #LIFEINCOLOUR
So this week’s letter, every week. I read a letter on the show, and offer light and healing inspiration and, and while what comes to me is often guidance for the person asking the question. I’m always tuned to the greater collected here. So, this is not just for the person who asks, it’s for all of us. If you’d like me to answer a letter for you, go here.
Dear Robin. I would prefer it if you not mentioned my name on the podcast is this is quite personal. I’ve been going through many changes in my life in the past three years, since I turned 40. My children are getting older. I have a 15 year old daughter, who’s going through a roller coaster of changes, as well as two younger boys. My mother has always had health problems and brought us up single-handedly, even though I did have a father. He was an alcoholic and most definitely suffered from narcissistic personality disorder. I have not chosen to see him in over 20 years, even though he lives in the same town, as I do. Between bringing up my children, and making sure my mother is okay and looked after and worrying constantly about all of them. I feel as though I’m standing on the outside looking in, on my own life for the past few years. All the color that I want saw and felt has vanished. As an artist, this has really affected my work as you can imagine, I can’t understand why this is all collapsed upon me in such a sudden way, these past couple of years. But I guess I carried it too long and it just crushed me. In the end, I have been going to see a therapist and talking about this for the past year and a half, on and off, and this is how I still feel so I’m looking through a glance, and everything that is happening, wanted to write you for a while but I didn’t know how quite to express what I wanted to say. I was hoping you could maybe give me some advice about how to feel present. Again, in my daily life. I know it’s a very big question. I find your podcast incredibly comforting, encouraging and uplifting every week. And it’s helped me so much. Your voice is so lovely to listen to. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this.
Wow, I so appreciate you taking the time to send it. A couple of weeks ago I said I would like more letters. Several of you sent letters like this, and these are ones that are hard to send you know the ones that were thinking about and dreaming about and worrying about and these themselves are just stating you know how we’re saying a year. Sometimes the gestation process is really huge, and a letter like this, is that exactly. So, I know it’s no small thing to send a letter like this, just want to say thank you so much for sending that to me. And let’s dive in.
So imagine, as I’m speaking to you and anybody else this is relatable for, I mean, raising my hand for sure. Put yourself in the center of a large circle, draw a large circle around yourself could do this on a piece of paper, draw yourself in the center, and then realize that you are in the center of your own experience in so many ways, without realizing it. So, this is really about choosing to put yourself in the center. And some of the people and stories in your life, we’re going to remove from the center. We can see it as a wagon wheel the spokes of the wheel. Every single person event happening story nuanced emotion, you know, old stuff is connected you connected to you via a spoke on this wheel, this circle you’re standing in like a wheel. And we are going to make some decisions today, of how we choose to allow the energy to connect with us, how we might be giving it sustenance that we actually could be using for ourselves. Let’s start there. Okay.
Consider yourself in the middle of your circle. And as you rotate around, looking at the whole wheel. The whole circle. I’ll get my analogy straight and the moment I promise. Take a look at everything you have chosen to include and putting it that way sometimes it’s the most powerful thing we can do even if we don’t realize we’re making a choice.
Even when we feel like we have no choice, which is often, how it feels right I mean I get that too. I feel like I have no choice. I have to do this, but I encourage us all to stick with this and try this as a practice, here are the things I’ve chosen to allow in my inner circle, it’s empowering to consider this. The minute I say I’ve chosen to do this. What can I choose to do? That’s right, choose to undo it choose to not do it choose to say no.
I’m choosing to put you there, and your self-care and your art time and your time for breathing and your time for you. I would draw this around yourself as a very, very precious sacred time and right away what shows up to me is this picture of the lungs, when I was studying anatomy and physiology. Back in the days, I thought I was going to become a doctor. We learned about this, the very last bit of air that saved in the lungs. I remember my teacher talking about this last little bit of lung air in your lungs for emergencies. Just in case. No, so I guess I’m saying that because I want to say to you that even though it feels like there’s no room right now in your life for you there is still his last little bit of room for you, and it could become so much more. But it begins by inviting the awareness, and the knowing that this is how you’ve chosen to live like there is no room for you, only for the emergency. So if you get sick, or you get a cold or, you know, something happens where you’re forced to take a break and focus on you, you’ll do it.
So we’re going to turn this around now because really, all the space should be for you. And even if, in the case of your daughter, or your mama, or anybody in your life. That is a choice. And it’s a want-to choice, not a have-to choice, it should be it could be.
So this is just us reorienting to the page, you know, reorienting ourselves in the circle of our lives. We are at the center. All of the Juju is for us, and fully present and fully tank up and fully.
Here is how we get through life’s emergencies. The people in our lives who are counting on us. How we show up and offer cool, calm, clear advice. How we stay cool and calm when other people are having emergencies and chaos that feels like there are big things happening and we need to triage the events.
So, this will be a practice you can do every single day as you get out of bed sometimes I talk about this. I get out of bed and I sit on the corner of my bed before I even get up to go to the bathroom, which is, as you know sometimes really hard to do. I sit and I say, I welcome myself into the day I set my intention for the day. And this is exactly what I’m doing I’m orienting myself inside my own circle inside the wheel of my day. Inside the wheel that is my life inside the, you know, the energy that is me and centering myself in and saying, and orienting, it’s like an orienting process and a reorienting process. Here we go. We’re here now. And we’re going forward. And whatever came yesterday, it’s done.
What can I unplug from? Which spokes can I disconnect from this wheel? And from my center that is no longer important or vital or interesting. Sometimes that’s just how it is you’ve got to make the choice to realize that this is no longer something I care to give my focus to give some of my energy towards. I was saying this earlier, that’s part of why when people sometimes assume something about me I make the decision not to correct them. I just let it go. Because of everything. Take a bit of my energy and do I want to give my energy to correcting something that is not even true or real or alive? No, I don’t, I don’t. We think about it like we have 100% for a day, every decision is taking some of that hundred percent away. So, it should be the ones that had. We want to do we choose to do and then be as expedient with that as we can, which means we’re not bringing our own drama chaos tiredness upset to it. We’re fully they’re fully on ready to help and assist and then we know, everybody is on the mountain doing their own journey, everybody is making their way, it is not your sole responsibility to lift people and care for them, they have to do some of this for themselves and remembering that you are in your own center helps you remember everyone has the choice to be in their own center. And you know, I just want to say in case anyone is listening thinking wow. Maybe I’m judging myself, I, I don’t want to sound like a ball buster, that’s not it at all but I mean, I think it’s some this exact topic is one of the deepest struggles on my own journey. And I’m I feel a lot of love and compassion for this topic. So I wanted to say that and also, I get it, you know, kids are a full time and then some jobs so, so much of what we’re talking about here is realizing, you have to be in the circle the center of your own circle, first for you as much time as you can grab for you. And then obviously the next piece is the kiddos. And even there there are choices to be made things that I mean, okay, the obvious one would be if there’s any volunteering at school, you know, things that feel possible for you to back off from doing. And that means we have to hold ourselves tighter and bear learn to bear the guilt of choosing ourselves, which is a journey in itself. So, just, you know, want to say that I understand the whole thing about being a mother. Though the wounding of that is we forget ourselves. And this is something that I always feel scared to talk about it, but I want to keep talking about it because I know it is important that we matter and we must put ourselves in the center of the circle first. So, being that you shared that your life has been an experience where you’ve had a mom who’s always had health problems. That makes me very curious about how the caregiver, life has really grown into the fabric of your being, how you’ve known that how you’ve had this conscious and unconscious knowing that the world for lack of a better word, the illness, going on for someone else matters more than how you’re doing. It’s just the way it is. And some of us really need to sit with this because it’s important that there needs to be an
adjustment period that might have been what it once was. But that doesn’t mean it’s how it needs to be going forward. Now some of us this is our core quality our core strength I know me doing the work I do having that life growing up was integral in helping me be somebody who cares for other people. But for us, that boundary thing is double, triple important, because we can just give all of our life force over the minute there’s something going on for someone else and like you, like me, you probably have people in your life who are very dependent on your light, and they’re not. They’re not, it’s not really an emergency though it’s not really something that feels have the highest integrity. In other words, they could be working on this for themselves. If only we could set a better boundary, you know, so you may want to consider just how do you want to reinvent your boundaries and your energetic perspective, going forward. And the biggest area I would draw your awareness to is that feeling that the color you one song felt vanishing his guidance to you, much like a dream comes to each individual person and it needs to be deciphered personally. This is guidance from your inner being to you that needs to be sat with personally and I would ask you to do that. What is the guidance saying because there can be a temptation to look at the sadness or the brokenness, or you know what has disintegrated around you but I actually feel this is an invitation to step in and choose to recolor your experience. And just as I said that this is funny but a screensaver just showed one of the first drawings I ever drew and it is not colored in, it is all done in marker, it’s waiting for the color to be added. Isn’t that perfect, it’s a little bird standing on a heart with hearts, all around her. Perfect. That’s for you.
So you know, how do you want to color this next year and how do you want it to be. That’s really the only thing that matters. You have a therapist you guys can work on these heavier pieces, and I just caution you to keep remembering that now is always new and going forward, anything can be, make sure you keep helping yourself to remember. Tomorrow is always new, and if it’s the same, it’s again, you know how we keep our vision the same so change it how you want it to be as far as how to feel present again in your daily life, it’s a beautiful thing to decide you matter. So I’m going to decide that you matter because you do matter. And you matter to me, and I’m going to invite you to decide that you matter and your day matters.
Begin with the hug. Then go make yourself a cup of tea and start small, I find those of us who are waking up out of this place right here. It can be terrifying to a lot too much time to our growth and progress, see me doing the air quotes for you. Don’t freak yourself out. We got to do this carefully, or the door will slam shot like you can’t believe so just gentle tender, I get up make a cup of tea. While they’re sleeping, maybe go outside and greet the day you know how I like to do it. Go out and greet the day.
And just maybe that’ll be enough for a bit. See what wants to come to you. See what wants to come in. How am I doing, and what do I need in this moment was our questions I’ve asked myself for 20 years. Whenever I have felt like I am looking through the glass that it was my life or something. I’m so far removed. I know I’ve stopped asking that. So you just take another breath and come back. What would I love today? What would I love today? And the last little bit, I may, I may have never told you this but in my early 20s My mom had a stroke, and I took care of her. On my own for more than a year, it lasted a while before she passed this caregiver thing. And
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I learned a lot in that time about what not to do. Going forward, and when number one husband was diagnosed with cancer. One of the first things that came to me was Robin, you have to make space for you now. It’s more important than ever that you see too your own life. And I tell you what that felt like the most selfish horrible thing, I could have ever thought at that moment. And I knew it was the voice of the Holy Spirit, talking to me, I knew it was the voice of my inner guide. And I kept it secret and safe, but I followed it. And it was only very recently that I began talking about it and you know when that was when number one husband himself said you have to be selfish. In order to prosper. It was like such a healing moment that I felt like yes, this is the right way. I’m telling you all of that. Because you will feel selfish. You’ll feel rude and heart like a horrible person horrible mother horrible daughter. But you’re doing it to make space for you. And that comes that everything. And don’t forget that choosing to care for yourself means you’re passing that light on to your son, and your daughter. And your other son, you’re passing that light on to your mother, and even to your father, whether they’re in the picture or not, it’s irrelevant.
This is energy we’re talking about and each person. We are connected to on that spoke on those spokes of the wheel. So everybody is always receiving it. And as you’re being very intentional with it. What they’re receiving is going to be much more powerful and helpful to them, which is everything, a caregiver wants to give. Right now it’s not coming with the energy of obligation duty, guilt, anger, resentment. It’s just coming with love. And the last thing I’ll say, back to your dad, one time ago, I was at the Art of Living Institute for a while and Sri Sri Ravi Shankar said, I went to his ashram and Canada, and I was having this whole moment, thinking that my whole life was going to need to uproot itself and change and do all this stuff which ended up being total crazy-making via my own ego, but anyway, he had this thing and he said the only duty. We owe a parent is gratitude for giving us life, everything else is dependent on the way the relationship goes, basically the rest has to be earned. That was such a profound teaching, for me, I was like, I don’t need to live in an ashram, I’ll just go home and remember this, people earn the right to be on your inner circle, but also we need to give gratitude where gratitude is due, and I in this moment and so grateful to your dad for bringing you into the world. And I will say thank you to him and have compassion for his journey and everything he’s been through.
Sounds like our dads would have been friends and I know for the life of a person in his shoes, it cannot be easy. And so I’ll add compassion. It couldn’t have been easy. Thank you for giving me life, period. The end. That’s it. The rest, we can let go, push it out of our circle, it doesn’t need to be the experience we choose to carry. Thank you. I see you, it is good. It is well, all as well. So feel free to keep what really felt good to you and cast off what didn’t. And friends out there I invite you to do the same. And, you know, here to help you a little more, feel free to write me again, share, be lovely to sit together in a session, maybe it makes me circle if that feels helpful.
So, May that serve you. And you know, let’s remember that gratitude, compassion, and all is always well. Period.
So, beloved, I loved this time with you. I hope it was meaningful and helpful to you. Remember to share this on with someone who might need it. Be that light bearer who’s helping someone else out.
And I’m going to go make some butternut squash. I’m on the soft. You know how it is a soft diet for the next two weeks. While the healings happening and it doesn’t mean it doesn’t have to be delicious.
So let’s go have a delicious day, and I’m sending you so much love. I happen to be your number one fan. Seeing you with shining heart, believing eyes and rocking it out. This has been me Rockin Robin, and I’m going to see you here next time next week or in a few minutes. Same bat time same bat channel, so much love to you by.
If I can read your letter and shine a little light for you, or you have a follow-up topic for a future episode write to me here.
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Hello friends 👋 I’ve been trying to summarize this episode, I manage to talk about manifesting and self-care and nosy parkers with their projecting tendencies, holidays, my oral surgery, the trip to Bali last year, the gestation process of manifesting and more. It’s really good. The inspiration is a poem to call in the good for next year and our letter is such a goodie–a relatable goodie–if you are a mama or caregiver and you’re wondering about the me time in all of it, you will love. Plus, my Bali journal, and more. Have a listen here or wherever you enjoy podcasts: Episode 66: Reflections, Year of Kindness, #lifeincolour http://robinhallett.libsyn.com/episode-66-reflections-year-of-kindness-lifeincolour Link in bio for full episode on iTunes, Spotify, Google Podcasts, or wherever you enjoy listening Always, thank you so much for supporting the podcast! I appreciate your awesome reviews, and you sharing these episodes with friends who can benefit. Want me to read your letter on the show? DM me here or email hello @ robinhallett.com #teawithrobin #acourseinmiracles #acim @robinhallett