The Journey

You Are Not the Cosmic Cruise Director! Here’s What to Do When You’re Done Giving to Everyone Else First // Tea with Robin Podcast Episode 52

how to set boundaries and take better care of yourself

Are there people in your life who ask for so much from you that you can’t manage to stay nice with them?

Do you ever wish you could just tell them what you really think, or pop them one with your caretaker’s clipboard?

Well, before it gets to that point, come listen to this episode! You are not the Cosmic Cruise Director for anyone unless you choose to be.

🎧 Listen to Episode 52: Cosmic Cruise Director, Irrational Joy, #motivationtochange

My session notes including time stamps are below

http://robinhallett.libsyn.com/episode-52-cosmic-cruise-director-irrational-joy-motivationtochange

This episode is also available wherever you enjoy podcasts 🙂

how to set boundaries and take better care of yourself


My session notes including time stamps are below 😍😘

Hello. It is I, Robin, sending rainbow hugs and extra sprinkles on top! Welcome to Episode 52.

1:30

How is the weather in your heart? Are you being sweet and kind and loving yourself up like you’re the most important person in your life? Even more than the dog or your kids? Don’t get mad at me now!

Today is a good topic even if it makes my eyes water and my face is going into tomato mode. Hello, Red no. 9 😉

We’re talking about boundaries today. Sometimes it’s such an interesting practice to set boundaries and still do it in a way that feels good – so you don’t go away hurting your own feelings along with the other person.

4:25

Did you bring a cuppa yum yum? Cheers to you, beautiful amazing, gorgeous, sweet friend.

5:20

Message from Robin and #1husband about the anniversary episode

Boundaries is such a big topic. OMG it’s a ramalamadingdong topic.

8:00

Let us be thinking about the people in our lives, the ones we want to be with but also run into problems with too. What are the common conflicts you end up finding yourself in?

Do you remember Julie McCoy from the Love Boat? Yeah, we are not the cosmic cruise director.

We aren’t supposed to be going around putting out all the fires and taking care of everyone else. At some point, we lose it, and hit people with our cruise director clipboard! It’s easy to see that in other people sometimes, isn’t it?

At some point you snap, something happens and you no longer can be nice. And you want to hit someone with the clipboard and that somebody is like, wait a minute! What just happened? While all along you’ve been allowing them to take over your life… and all of a sudden you pop them one.

9:41

And it sucks because you go away feeling bad about yourself. You feel upset. And the other thing is, it begins an unnecessary journey of mental tennis:

Well, I told them not to call me!

Well, maybe I am overreacting!

Well, I think they should know not to interrupt me!

The other person sees you as the problem, and unreasonable, or crazy. But really, the situation is over the top, not you!

how to set boundaries and take better care of yourself

One of the things is that people don’t always realize what they are doing because they might not be awake. But you are. So you need to practice.

Who are you?! An important, sacred heart. And my prayer today is that you and I both realize that in a deeper way. If you’ve had edges in your life where at the heart of it all, I have not been treating myself as a sacred being and this is the result of that. When you come to that place, it’s a very good thing because right here is a new beginning to make huge shifts in your life.

12:15

If you’ve been feeling run over and then you got reactionary, we can shift this energy.

I talk about going to the Robbie Beach to get my head and heart straight. Things have been piling up, between sessions and the friends I walk with, and my own life too with family stuff and commitments… I’ve even been babysitting my furry nephew, Harley.

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And it’s led me to this place where I’ve been snappy and also trying not to cry a lot. I don’t like that place. It’s so annoying. Sometimes it’s so challenging.

14:30

I heard myself saying, I am ready to snap. If I had a clipboard, I would’ve been bonking people on the head. And you know what? It doesn’t matter who was wrong or right, if you’re in there reacting to people, you’re participating.

If you ever find yourself in this space of, what the hell just happened, when people leave… you know something energetic was going down. Give yourself some space.

It’s tough to stay nice with people who are driving you bonkers and asking for too much. Remember that. My thing is always, I feel taken for granted and not thanked. When that happens to me, I know I am not including myself in my own life — I matter the most, my happiness comes first.

17:00

We’re sparks of the divine and there’s no need to be hitting people with the clipboard! We can do this, we just need to learn the signs of when we’re needing a break. If you find yourself breaking in a familiar place, that’s a sign you need to add a new technique to your repertoire.

17:51 >> I loved this part. Giggles. Let’s not air our dirty laundry, friend 😉

Realize we need a new policy. It’s a lot like training a dog. Lots of repetition. From here on out, every time I come to an intersection with a stop sign, I need to sit and wait. (use that as a metaphor for situations involving people with crossed wires, etc)

Do you have those people in your life who are over the top, flamboyant, dramatic? Yes. So from here on out, you can say, wait and take a breath and then here we go, we are entering into this joint space with that kooky person. It’s a lot like my healer’s prep I do before sessions every day. A routine I do.

20:10

Stanly Tucci, gird your loins! We are not here catering to everyone else and their odd-ball behavior.

how to set boundaries and take better care of yourself

22:22

We need to dump the bucket – we don’t always realize the heaviness we’re carrying isn’t even ours. It’s the people in our lives, world events, etc. Gotta learn to dump our bucket. I spent three hours doing nothing but listening to waves, reading my book, swimming on my raft.

We don’t realize how much we’re carrying. The list is bigger than we realize. It has to come out. You’re not a failure if you find yourself breaking. We don’t want to be in resistance to our own hearts.

I am interested in the bigger picture that I came here for joy and peace and that doesn’t mean there won’t be days that feel challenging. But we can choose! Right?

You don’t always have a choice to be together with people or not, they’re family for example, and they are challenging. It’s okay if you feel upset. How can you help yourself dump the bucket and then learn how to approach connection with that person in a new way.

25:00 >> Grandpa Don and $5.00 and buying all the candy I wanted.

If you got a little reactionary with that person who is often testing your line and you got a little snarky… don’t beat yourself up. Don’t sit in a place of shame or guilt. If you do need to clear the air, you can apologize but don’t carry it! Dump the bucket.

It’s perfectly okay to tell yourself, Wow I see there’s too much on your plate right now, let’s make space for you. 

You have a right to cancel plans, change tact, do whatever you need to have that time alone for yourself. It’s so necessary. You matter!

Things start out pretty small. Then it gets bigger and bigger and the people don’t seem to get worse, but we do. We feel less and less alive and life keeps trying to wake us up and say, hey put down the clipboard, lady! Make some time for you.

28:00

We end up hurting our own feelings and the other people think you’re a kooky bird.

29:57

Chapter 5 ACIM

I must have decided wrongly, because I am not at peace.

I made the decision myself, but I can also decide otherwise.

I want to decide otherwise, because I want to be at peace.

I do not feel guilty, because the Holy Spirit will undo all the consequences of my wrong decision if I will let Him.

I choose to let Him, by allowing Him to decide for God for me.”

Each time you can make an improvement. Don’t beat yourself up and shame yourself. It’s so helpful to talk about this stuff, isn’t it? People tell me all the time, you’re the only one I can talk to about this. But here on our podcast, we can too.

how to set boundaries and take better care of yourself

Announcements this week:

  • Soul Gathering is happening this week, our topic is on Love and Abundance. Allowing ourselves to receive all that’s around us all the time… and what we might be doing to block the flow. If you’d like to join us, it’s free, click here to sign up for the next one
  • If this episode has been helpful, I’d appreciate you sharing this with anyone it may help. Click the share buttons above or below, or always I appreciate a review on iTunes

34:00

This week’s inspo:

Do something irrational for you. Make some space for your own heart. I go to the beach. I make time to do art or garden or play. I figure out how to handle the things that seem to plague my time and batch things so there’s downtime for me.

Take care of you. Love you. What if every day could be a joyous experience?

I want to live every day in a joyous way and not feel like it’s a heavy slog. So where can you experience some irrational joy for yourself? Do something that makes no sense, wild, and ridiculous for you to be doing on a weekday like going to the beach!

People say to me, oh must be nice… I need three hours at the beach. You could be doing it and in fact, most people seem to have time and means more than me but they still have good excuses for why they can’t.

37:00

This week’s letter: #motivationtochange

Life does bring us challenges and it can bog us down. Not because we’re jerks or ding dongs but because we allow life to encroach and every yes we say turns out to be one more person on our inner circle we may be obligated to.

Energetic stagnancy is happening because we allow it to be the case. When we’re treading water, we choose to spend it “recovering” in ways that don’t support us.

Start small. How do you want it to be?

Show references below

⭐A Course in Miracles Quotes:

I must have decided wrongly, because I am not at peace.

I made the decision myself, but I can also decide otherwise.

I want to decide otherwise, because I want to be at peace.

I do not feel guilty, because the Holy Spirit will undo all the consequences of my wrong decision if I will let Him.

I choose to let Him, by allowing Him to decide for God for me.” Chapter 5, last page

You might enjoy the Course in Miracles practices I offer here.

⭐Related links for this episode:

Life gives you what you need

Life Loves You 

If You Ever Worry About Your Bad Habits Listen to This // Tea with Robin Podcast Episode 51

⭐Books mentioned in this episode:

A course in Miracles: Combined Volume

You might enjoy the Course in Miracles practices I offer here.

⭐Movies mentioned in this episode:

The Devil Wears Prada

Boston Legal Season 1-5 Complete Collection

Thank you for listening, may it serve you!

Hugs and love,

boundaries with robin hallett intuitive healer

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🎧❤️ Episode 52, woohoo! I’m talking boundaries and new beginnings and treating ourselves as sacred beings. Because when you end up feeling run over by people and you’re reactionary, hitting them will not do 🙌💕 And hello from the Robbie beach 💦😍🎡 If you are interested in honoring how much you matter and also rock your boundaries, this is the one for you. You are not the cosmic cruise director for everybody else. Do you remember Julie McCoy from The Love Boat? We’ll also have some inspiration on choosing yourself and irrational joy and our letter this week comes from a friend who’s seeking support to make changes in what seems an impossible situation. Come grab a cuppa yum yum and meet me here. ☕🤗🎧 Episode 52: Cosmic Cruise Director, Irrational Joy, #motivationtochange http://robinhallett.libsyn.com/episode-52-cosmic-cruise-director-irrational-joy-motivationtochange

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