Thanksgiving is coming and I’ll be honest with you.
The holiday that’s about gathering with friends and family to give thanks hasn’t always been easy for me.
Hard as I’d try to focus on what I was thankful for, I’d get hung up on the stuff that seemed to suck the life out of the holiday for me.
I missed my parents who had passed away. I missed my friends and family who were too far away to visit. There were people I wasn’t speaking to (and some not speaking to me). Then there were the people who weren’t speaking to the people who were coming to dinner.
I felt sad and crispy. All I could see was what wasn’t happening. Who wasn’t coming. What I couldn’t do.
On top of it all, I kept judging myself for being such an ungrateful jerk. I mean, why couldn’t I just shut up and be happy already? There was so much to be thankful for. How come I couldn’t just consider myself lucky and count my blessings?
The thing is, it’s really hard sometimes to pull it together and get excited when you just simply aren’t.
Stuff happened and life had changed. And, you know what? I needed to be a bit easier on myself.
And so I was. I learned to make room for the feelings that were coming up rather than shoving them down and putting on my happy face.
I stopped pretending to be ok when I wasn’t. And sometimes that meant I did not go anywhere for the holidays because that’s what was best for me at the time.
Over the years the energy has shifted for me. Mostly because when I would feel the old sadness coming on, I would stay present with it – and not abandon myself.
I would allow the tears to come, and let my heart feel touched by the people I was missing once again. I let them feel present with me in that space.
And then, I would ask myself sweetly: What would feel special and meaningful to me this year?
And that’s the way to get through the holiday blues. Notice I didn’t say that’s the way to beat those holiday blues.
So how do you really heal those holiday blues ?
Take a deep breath and be present with what is.
Make room for where you’re at no matter what.
Speak kindly and gently to yourself about it.
Then, ask what you would love to do.
Loving yourself always in all ways is where it’s at 🙂
Wherever you are right now, I am sending some love to you.
Whatever you’re experiencing right now is okay with me.
And, I am grateful for the experiences I’ve had–even though they’re not always great experiences–because they allow me to share with you.