Obstacles are NOT a sign that you should quit your dreams.
I explain why obstacles hold us back plus reveal the trick to overcome them and harness their energy.
If you want to transform your obstacles, be sure to watch today’s episode.
By the way, this is part two in the series of how to overcome obstacles read part one of overcoming obstacles here. Not a video person? See the transcript below
Hello beautiful Friend, it’s me, Robin Hallett, Intuitive Healer and Teacher over at Robin Hallett dot com. How are you today?
Today I am talking about obstacles and how to overcome them
How do we overcome the obstacles in our lives? First, a little back-story. In the past few weeks, I’ve been talking about many kinds of obstacles with people… I’ve got friends going through divorce and friends with bankruptcy issues, I know someone studying for the MCATS and getting very nervous about passing and becoming a doctor, and another who is a newer lawyer and she’s taking the bar in the third state she had to take them in, I have another friend who had a crazy ice-dam that collapsed her roof in the middle of the bitter winter, and then the front of the house had to be ripped off because the contractor found termites, she’s been living in a small hotel room with her husband and two little kids who’ve had some health stuff going on and then a family member had emergency surgery. They’re still in the hotel. Another friend is leaving his business, a long time ‘safe-bet’ business. He’s got a new baby, a big family, and there’s a lot of panic and worry and fear rising about going out on his own as an entrepreneur and speaker.
So many of us have obstacles and worries! And, in my own life I always have little things that come up around making these videos and writing my blog…self-confidence seems to be my obstacle. I know people tell me I am good at this, I connect with my audience on video, but still, this is my obstacle, I get nervous, I worry…
here’s what obstacles really are
Obstacles are things that present themselves in our lives which make us nervous and upset or capture a lot of our focus and attention and they’re fear based. The energy of an obstacle has fear to it. Fear. False Evidence Appearing Real or as I like to say it, Fork Everything and Run.
the wrong way to attempt overcoming them
A lot of people would like to treat an obstacle like it’s jumping over a hurdle or kicking the hurdle down. I don’t know if you had to run track in gym? In high school I had to take track in gym and I hate exercising, honestly, that hasn’t changed, but there was something about hurdles that I extra extra did not enjoy doing and I would run at this hurdle and be so determined and I would just wanna hop over that thing and I was always the one who tripped on it, I fell, I would get close to the hurdle, freak out and then run around it. Obstacles, hurdles…not my favorite thing.
Some people think you can blow obstacles off and pretend they are not happening but I will tell you what, that is a complete waste of time failure method: you will never get what you are supposed to get out of the obstacle if you pretend it’s not happening. It’s only going to get louder and scarier in your life… it’s going to wake you up in the middle of the night, you know? An obstacle to me is not just life’s little way of pissing you off or trying to screw with you, an obstacle is something for your healing. I talk a lot about dragons on the path that present themselves to you, and it’s up to us to stop and ask, “What are you trying to reveal to me? What is the message?”
we have a lot of false beliefs about obstacles
For a lot of us, an obstacle is just something that happens to us and we want to give up and start crying, or we take it as a sign as life is just too hard or maybe what we want is not meant to be. I know a lot of people who come to me for healing and believe that there are angels and guides giving them little negative woo-woo hints that they should give up on their dream because something happened. I say, that’s complete nonsense. Absolutely not true!
but obstacles do assist with our healing
What it’s really about in the minute you say “I want to do this thing in the world, I have a dream for myself, I have a vision, something I want to do” I see it like anything that is standing in your way between you and your dream, your rough edges need to be cleared, cleansed, smoothed out, treated and healed, so that you can go forward with more gusto and more of yourself than ever before.
So I look at an obstacle like my self confidence that I was speaking about earlier, I still get nervous about making videos, I still get nervous before pressing publish on these posts… and I just call that building confidence…this is something I’ve really been working on, and whether you’re just meeting me today or you’ve known me for a long time – this is something I’ve really been working on and what I know to be true is that I really have a longing to speak out in the world and share this message of healing and love and inspire you to be your best self and kick ass in your life on the things that you really want. I feel so fired up about helping you get to where you want to be. I need to heal and clear any obstacles to that mission so I can be the best ME to help the best YOU 🙂
and they are never a sign to quit your dream
I meet so many people who are trying to tame their dreams down because they think they are completely out of reach, and what I want to help you do is get really focused and clear. So I am CLEAR that this is my mission and of course I have some self-confidence issues and I worry about how I sound or what I look like or (if you could be in my head for 5 minutes…ai yai yai) of course that happens, but I also know I am being asked to clear those things to get centered and very focused on what it is I really want and learn how to deal with that energy that comes up and to find ways like my non-negotiable practices of meditating, exercising, eating well, and watching the kinds of people + energies I allow around me. All of these things are connected to a stronger energetic confidence that I am learning to build. So when I look at my obstacle of self-confidence, what used to happen was: I guess I’ll never get to be where I want to be because it’s hopeless. And what would happen in me is this huge nervous system response of: Just give up and die lady! Go lay on the couch and watch tv and eat your bon-bons (I have a sugar thing) and just forget about everything. But guess what happens if you give up and go lie on the couch and watch tv and eat your bon-bons? You feel like a loser! You believe it’s totally hopeless and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy!
Obstacles help you stay on your mission
I have a friend I was telling you about who is leaving his big time job and he is going out into the world and he has little kids and a wife and he’s gonna try his hand at running seminars and being a speaker and he is freaked out – it’s almost a little funny (I’m teasing him because I know he’ll be watching this). He’s a little bit freaked out – and I tell him this is his obstacle presenting itself, so how is your resolve? How firm are you in your knowing that you are capable and able and you have a mission? How clear are you feeling? Are you staying in alignment with what it is that you know to be true for yourself and what it is that you’re here to do in life? You need to stay laser-focused and centered and grounded and do the things that you need to do to stay in alignment with your mission. Because that obstacle is presenting itself to make sure to help you stay focused and composed. Think about the obstacle as a reminder: How bad do you want this? You need to be the energy that you say you want so if you want success and the good life (whatever that is to you) look, your energy needs to radiate that now, your energy needs to welcome that in NOW.
but when we make obstacles into tiny gods, we suffer
An obstacle can be like a little god that we place on an altar for worship. I am thinking about a client I have who is going through a divorce and a lot of divorces are nasty, this one seems particularly bad–there’s some custody stuff, there are court appointed people that are involved and every time I talk to this friend, I can really see how he treats his upset like a god put on the altar for worship, “This thing is going to destroy me, I’m going to lose all my money, I won’t have the custody agreement I want, I am going to have to pay and pay and pay, it’s never gonna be over, and the lawyers are trying to screw me!”
These are all of the obstacles, these are all of his upsets and he is standing at a really powerful crossroads. In one direction is the Upset Villa, containing crap and upset. And it’s a familiar territory, which has never brought you a good day, it’s never brought you inspiration or clarity, has never brought you love or a feeling of safety in your heart…down that familiar path is horror and more horror, and upset. Once you’re on that path you need to do things to stay in alignment with that energy. Outrage, upset, rage, terror, fear, despair, anxiety, what is supportive of keeping in alignment with that energy? Crappy diet, crappy sleep, no self-care practices, angry conversations, there is just no way anything can move in related to peace, ease, success, clarity, joy, abundance when you’re going down that path.
Here is the big secret to obstacles
So my number one biggest tip is this: know that it’s an obstacle and not the final result or destination…this thing that is happening is not the end. And at some point you must awaken to this – and say oh, oh my gosh I am completely upset and unnerved and rattled because for the last hour I’ve been traumatizing myself by telling myself a story of how crappy it all is and how screwed I am and how bad it’s gonna be and how it’s never gonna get better… uh oh, but I am awake to it now! I just caught it; I just woke up to that obstacle I was making into a little god. Now I am going to get back into alignment with what I know to be true: life is good, I am grateful, I have a mission, I believe in what I am here to do, I know with certainty that I am loved, I am a spark of the Divine, a child of God… I speak to myself this way all the time. You have to help yourself, you have to recognize this is an obstacle and understand that you are listening to and obeying the obstacle as if it is a god in your life. You’ve placed it on an altar and now you’re worshipping at it.
worrying about money is an obstacle too
If work is slow and you’re worried about your monthly nut, you’re worrying about money; you cannot attract more money when you’re someone who worries about money. When you’re sitting at the altar of worry the only thing you can pray for there is MORE worry. You’re bowing to worry and it’s like praying: please give me more lack and fear and more terror. I know you don’t mean to do this, but this is what’s happening. You cannot attract abundance while sitting at the altar of worry.
an obstacle presents itself to you so you can heal and clear some things blocking your path…
It’s an opportunity for you to bring yourself into alignment with what it is that you know to be true; what it is that you are lit up about doing in the world; and staying on track. It’s a chance to say to yourself: hey don’t make this a tiny god, don’t sit down and worship the hurdle…think about where it is that you really want to go.
It’s extremely helpful for me to say: hey Robin the obstacle is not more important than the goal. Remember, the goal is the goal, not the obstacle! We can stay so focused on our upset! It amazes me, (and it happens to me too) and I am thankful when even if two hours have gone by where I’ve been struggling that I woke up. And you can wake yourself up too! It’s how we wake ourselves up from bad dreams.
Strange but true… we find comfort in familiar obstacles
Don’t allow yourself to slip into the comfortable familiarity of disappointment and disillusionment, don’t do it! You need to set a standard of excellence for yourself and hold to it. Because you will have ample opportunities to lay on the couch and eat your bon-bons and allow the story to narrate itself you that you’re a loser and you’re never gonna get anywhere.
Not everyone takes to the couch with bon-bons. I have friends who get busy with paperwork, or they busy themselves on email all day long. I have a client who was talking to me the other day about the overwhelm of 43 emails in his inbox. Let’s not make it like email is life or death or treat it like it’s the almighty lord of email that we’re worshiping.
Please don’t use obstacles as an excuse
Obstacles often become an excuse preventing you from where you really want to be. And that’s really what a lot of obstacles become: comfortable excuses to stay exactly where you’re at and make no progress. Now I know you don’t mean it, and I am not saying you’re doing it on purpose and you’re an idiot! You know? No. you didn’t mean to do it, but now that you know, take responsibility and get yourself going again. Stay accountable to your journey. It’s so easy to be lost in overwhelm land, and feel another day slip by without getting things done. Again, wake yourself up! Say to yourself: this is the obstacle presenting itself, and I am not interested in making this a tiny god I want to worship. My nervous system is listening, the cells of my body are listening and I am not going to make this the most important part of my journey. My words and my thoughts matter, my actions matter and I am going to go in the direction I am truly delighted to be going in.
Your mission should you choose to accept it…
Listen, I know you are going to make it. I know you’re going to be all right! You’re gonna be better than alight! I want you to be wonderfully excited about your life and my wish for you is that the next obstacle that presents itself to you is taken for an obstacle and not a stop. Not as a sign that you’re not meant to be what it is that you long to be. That you say, ‘hey kiddo, this is only an obstacle… it’s only a dragon on the path asking me to learn something…let me learn it, let me see it, let me grow myself from it and let me continue on my way. I am blessed, I am loved, I am a spark of the Divine, love rains down on me, I am amazing, I am the shizzle, I am fantastic, and I am going to continue to be fantastic…”or you can say, “Ugh I am a piece of crap and life is so hard…” which do you want? It’s up to you; nobody can twist your arm.
All right, I know which you’re going to choose! You’re gonna rock it like you mean it, right? This is Robin Hallett signing off. If I can help you please leave a comment or hop over to my blog at Robin Hallett dot com and let’s see what we can do! Take care, ciao ciao bye bye.