“Don’t try to convince anyone that you’re a good person. Quit trying to win someone over who isn’t kind but only tolerates you-you don’t need their approval. Be kind, be respectful, but you don’t have to stay… go where you are celebrated. Keep living forward and trust that the right people are there. You never need to convince anyone to love you.” – Joel Osteen
I can remember that yukky feeling going all the way back.
It seemed lots of people didn’t love me as much as I loved them. People in my family. Some of my teachers, some of the kids at school.
Honestly, I didn’t get it.
I remember once in kindergarten I met a little girl on the playground and I asked her if she wanted to be friends and she said I had to pay her a quarter for that. We discussed this over recess.
Just what would my quarter buy? I asked.
Friendship, she said.
Why do I need to pay you? I asked.
She said: It’s salary, my job will be to be your friend.
I thanked her for her offer and declined.
I knew I was awesome and sparkly and bright.
I truly believed that the friends who were BLESSED and LUCKY enough to have me for a friend would show up eventually. I knew it even in the times when I felt tired and lonely and there was a wavering in my belly. Times when the FOMO threatened to take me over. Even when I would occasionally wonder if I had landed on the wrong planet.
Not everyone’s gonna dig you and that’s okay – go where you’re celebrated.
Don’t waste your time on people who don’t get you, who can’t celebrate you, who don’t understand.
Release the ones who receive you with a lukewarm heart. The ones who cannot mirror the fullness of life back.
Those who just cannot seem to follow the rules of kindness and courtesy, the awkward ones who don’t get “how it works” and try to take you to the circus–bless them on their way.
No more sparring partners for you.
No more begging.
No more quarters.
They’re not the right fit for you, sweetheart. I mean it.
This is not an unkindness, it’s simply excellent discernment.
You just have to trust.
You are phenomenal and sparkly and wonderful and kind…and your right peeps are out there.
Trust that who and what is meant for you is always meant for you.
Know it in your bones that the good juju is accumulating in your cosmic escrow account at all times.
The right opportunities are aligning.
The right people are coming.
Trust this and affirm it to yourself again and again.
You’ve seen evidence of this in the past, right? Of course, this will continue to happen! Why wouldn’t it?
Know it and live by it: You do your best work, and you feel your best, and you have the most fun when you’re authentically you and that can’t happen when you don’t feel comfortable with the audience you’re in front of. We all have woundings and not everyone will be a good fit for our certain type.
Meanwhile, feel great while you wait.
Remind the inner People Pleaser that you really only need to please yourself.
Tell the lonely inner one that they belong to you, and you are excellent company.
Whenever you feel rejected, or left out, or kicked to the curb, say thank you for the gut-guidance saying, thank you for that! We just dodged a major bullet, sweetie 😉
Go where you’re celebrated, not where you’re tolerated.
No more lukewarm receptions.
You are an awesome human being and the people who are BLESSED and LUCKY enough to be in your life know it.
And they’re not the ones who give you grief and make the stinky cheese face at you.
You’ll know the right ones by the conversations often punctuated by, “ME TOO!” and “I LOVE THAT!” and “YOU ARE THE BEST.”
Hugs and love and no more quarters, OK?
YOU ARE THE BEST!!