If you are someone who cares deeply, you probably know what it’s like to be caught in the swirl of thinking and emotion when upsetting things are happening.
You probably know what it’s like to not sleep well because a part of you feels upset, worried.
You’re not like everyone else and that’s a good thing.
Never forget, you’re in great company. Consider all the people you admire, the ones who’ve been role models to you. They’ve probably been called the same things, but you admire and appreciate them for exactly that trait.
If people hint that you’re different, weird, challenging, and especially if you’ve ever been called intense… this one is for you.
Listen to this episode here or read the transcript (with timestamps) below.
🎧 Listen to Episode 143: For Those Who Care Deeply
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Hello Beloved. It’s me Robin. Robin Hallett intuitive healer and Light Sparkler at Robin Hallett calm and this is Tea with Robin. On today’s episode. Are you somebody who carries people with you in your heart in your mind thinking about other people upset about other people hearing what they said to you again and again, caring deeply all the ways we use our spirituality to try and fight these urges we have. This episode is for us who care deeply. come grab a cuppa yum-yum and meet me here.
Well, hello, beautiful friend. It’s me Robin. Welcome back to the podcast Tea with Robin. This is Episode 143 43 143. All of the shownotes any links I mentioned any good tidbits, tidbits you can find in the episode description where you’re listening now or go to my website Robin Hallett comm slash 143 if you’re new around these parts, how do you do it? It’s lovely to meetcha my gratitude for however you came to be here today. This is a podcast about healing. And I would say it’s super down to earth.
offered from a friend who’s in your corner and has your back and that doesn’t always mean you know I’m putting the icing on the cake for you. Sometimes it’s about digging deep and taking responsibility for how we show up in life. So I hope you love it here. Yeah, I really do. I you know sometimes I feel like we don’t have enough of this kind of love going on in the world and we need more of it. So I hope to stick around. Returning. Hello, hello. How has your week been? Have you been doing this week? I am noticing for friends in the love posse. That’s what I call all of us in the tribe that we hang together. It’s been an intense week. So If you’ve found some emotionality in your giddy up this week if you’ve had some intensity going on if it’s been deep for you if you haven’t slept well You’ve been having some fun The goal is stuff going on. I’m Yeah You know, I’m going to Say you’re right on track. Things are Moving on. Things are clearing There’s energy happening. This is one of my times where I don’t know if you want to call it up leveling or we’re going down to the bottom floor. Why? Where another we’re deepening and expanding and it’s really really good but sometimes if you’re not careful, you can be tempted to say the shit is hitting the fan. And my life sucks and basically people are I have gotten nowhere on my journey. Am I right? You can be so hard on yourself. So you know if that’s you too, I’m sorry. And then you might love I’m not that you need my love to get through it or anything but I just want to say in solidarity, like, I get it and you are not alone and yes, I’m sending you some love right now?
Yeah So it’s never a bad thing to do. stock of where you’re at and really keep trying to hear what it is you’re actually feeling. The stuff you’ve been thinking about The vibes you’ve been writing in to make space for It’s really important over We’re here. I’m doing pretty well. Actually I’m here Someone that goes too and I’m fine Then it’s kind of exciting to be in this ways of going deeper and knowing myself more And also Inviting my myself to look at the In a new way And we’re going to talk about this, I’m not trying to talk and code I just don’t want to say it all twice. We’re going to talk about this today. So if you’re somebody who’s Our goals and you care deeply and you have that mind that who see the ruminating That never seen To shut up going round and round and round About thing you’re Thinking about The thing that person And sad or regretting whatever. This one’s for you today. Let’s dive in. Did you Did you bring some yum yum with you today Did you bring something to sip along? I made. I’ve been up it’s Saturday as I record this. I’ve been up super early working Longer day today which I love. I am So Just like If I’m working with you right now. I get to Say it here because you You know, like it would be weird one to one I am so in love with the people I’m working
with right now
I can’t even tell you. It is so much fun to just have permission To say a I love what I do, but be Also the people I see Right now this Hold time, pray. I’m just In love it is such a joy And Honestly, even that sometimes It’s hard to allow Yeah, you can To care deeply It’s all right. Yeah All right. So I have hacked Going in one income which is kind of cold cocoa now. In the other I got this one Coffee You know what I missed? Just pour those together that seemed like a good idea. So here’s to us We rock There’s never been a wrong with us. There’s never been any We’ve needed to corral Change Fix or fade. Here’s the celebrating our Awesomesauce exactly as we is cheer Cheer. I shouldn’t Said holla that’s what that sounded like. Cheers. Cheers Do you ever judge yourself when you get so goofy? I sometimes do but you know, I’m trying to honor That’s just who I am for reals. And if I keep editing all the things out there. worry about it. We’re not gonna have a very good time. Cast cheers Again, it’s Cheers All right.
Here we go. have been noticing that there’s a lot going on. And like, there have been a lot of energy developing for people individually and it’s in your relationships, it’s in your connections with other people, things are moving, things are adjusting. And what happens is we go away, judging ourselves, we go away blaming ourselves, we go away looking at ourselves in the same way we always do. And what is really so important is that you recognize you’re going through something right now. You’ve been having some stuff happening. I’ve got some friends right now who are taking care of elderly, elderly. I feel a little sensitive already at 52. I feel sensitive to that word, but you know, taking care of parents who are getting up there themselves and need help. I have friends who are dealing with their own health issues. I have friends who are raising tiny kids right now and having their challenges. It’s just all over the place. And friends who are going through transition with their careers with their writing books, finishing writing books, there are several of you right now in that place. Friends, you know, whatever it is that’s been happening for you. It’s so important that you turn a new page with how you relate to yourself in this place. Don’t just say the same old stuff you always say about yourself. You know, this is a new time New Energy and new perspective is called for if you ever hope to go to the place you say you want to go like know who you are more fully most people will say to me like when they come for their first session I’ll say why are you here or something like that? What is it that you’re hoping to gain in our time? Most people will say some version of AI No, I’m here for a reason. Like, here on The earth plane Here No, I meant To be doing something great Really important with My life or I’m supposed to be doing something different than what I’m doing whatever. I know I’m here for that and I want to know what that is. And I want to know more. myself I want to know who I Wonderful You can relate to that. I mean, I serve can relate to Now, of course you’re coming to cicadas. There’s nothing I can do about the cicadas. They just Come whenever the hell they feel like it sometimes it’s the Morning. Sometimes it’s the night So I’m sorry if you’re listening The earbuds up Probably in the hair, them going on just a part of part of summer so this morning I’ve been thinking about it a lot. I’ve been saying it to friends that
is so wrong With admitting you struggle With caring deeply
yourself and your journey instead of being so hung up Upon the upset itself or if you feel like You could label yourself as a codependent person or a person who needs to take a lot of space because the people Your life can be so wack You won’t be able The slide for 89 days in in a row because of the way they behave or whatever, you know, what would be so lovely is just to say,
this is me and I care deeply and what I actually care the deeply about Is myself and you know what? It’s not wrong. I’m not wrong. I’m not bad or wrong, if I care the most about me I think we missed the boat That when we’re so disturbed about other people All whatever they’re doing, you know if you’re you’re having a health issues and it’s the caregivers, that you’re so disturbed About the way they don’t get you, they don’t see you or the way they don’t Do things the way you need them to do Are your Mom with your Kids and your partner is you feel Kind of sucky. at helping Now more, you know, or whatever it is you’re, you know, I give the eggs Gamble’s all day long. Why don’t we all take a second Just get a beat on what’s going on for us. You know, that’s always the better way. Good. It’s a good thing that you care deeply. The thing is when you care deeply about your upset in that you’re in the spin cycle with it. It is not the deed care I think you should be doing right now. No You don’t have To fight you Your urges to be involved are concerned or Even committed To it You You learn So much about yourself in this cycle, you know, so many people want me to help them like let Learn teach me how to have boundaries be Because my parents are a nightmare or teach me how to add To keep for myself better, and all of that is such important stuff. Let me let me speak up for myself or how to confront this person or how did I let them down gently All of that. There’s nothing wrong with any of that. The thing is, it’s not the main point and the main point is you met are the most you matter to you? matter the most and you matter No matter what going on.
the long way around is thinking you have to work it out out there. You have to get that person to understand you or if you’ve been really terrified about your financial situation, you know so much going on right now. In the world, and I should say here, you know if you have been In the country’s hit buy stuff that’s going on right now. I have been holding you In my heart as I go through my days to so much love and I there is nothing quite like natural does that Astor’s or riots or looting or food shortages are you know Just a So many things happening. to trigger these kinds of issues, but I want you to know You know, there’s so many people behind the scenes holding space for you praying for you. loving you. You have not been forgotten. That is for sure. And it is what it is. You are where you are now The deal so whatever going on for you if you’ve been terrified about financial stuff or food stuff, or are you going to be safe, whatever it is the practices You have got to find the way to bridge your fear Your terror Then Mind swirl that
and actually showing up for yourself. Am I making any sense here? So like if you’re terrified all the time It’s sort of like not doing anything to help yourself. But if you’re terrified or let’s say you’re in you’re having debilitating pain, you know If you just keep repeating that to yourself Now, over and over and over And basically applying the SAP and doing the things and changing the bandages, but there’s nobody They’re saying I’m here with you. I love you and what You got this. You may This is horrible. Right now, it’d be Terrible. You’re talking to yourself. Here You know, it’s not as how fall when you can be present with your To carry about yourself. This thing you’re going through is going To move So much more quickly. The healing is good. happen Because anything happening in our Lives According to And I should say Say You know, according to The Spirit be Known as rock in this lifetime I was thing is about you Learning you Your place in the US inverse and how Breaking in important that is to you It should be To you and just imagine for yourself all the stuff you have to blow through in terms of You’re conditioning your stories. Your family of origin 10 Know that and just function there. Right Big Big Bank So, showing up for yourself. It’s a good thing to care deeply about yourself. You don’t have to fight the urge to be involved or good concerned are committed to yourself. You don’t have to fight the urge to be overly committed to other people, either You know, I feel like we waste a lot of time being afraid and trying to micromanage the energies. But what is really honest and true Drew is just like you, you are here and you matter. And those other people are here and they matter and everybody needs to do for themselves. You don’t have to overdo for other people. Just because They’re going through heavy, heavier shit than you and you don’t have to overdo for yourself just because you’re going through heavier shit than anybody else. You know, that’s the thing. Let’s just show up. For us and be here. It’s an amazing thing because like for those of us who identify with being codependent, we’re like you can’t relax. You can’t rest. You can’t find If somebody else is in peril, or they’re mad at you or you said Something you don’t like the way you said it now in retrospect, you know you can’t rest. You can’t relax. Am I the only one here who’s gonna admit that? Because that’s me to a tee and I’m Not to a tee. I mean, I’ve been working on this since 1873. But and it’s so much better now. You know, it really is. I am so amazed at my own progress. I am so proud of myself but I’m When we’re in it, we’re really in it and you can and you can Know the hat and you know it There’s nothing wrong With us If you lose sleep at night Because you’re I’m involved in some stuff right now sometimes I can’t sleep because I’m going to meet new people for healing work and it’s a big deal to me and sometimes I lose sleep and I I won’t sleep and for that Reason I will stop Try and meet The sooner The better because I can Go like this for long can’t rest on Until we Connect and complete whatever this thing is that all this tension is building up for, you know
what I’m saying?
You When you love yourself, you take care of yourself. So there’s some wrong if you’re Deep care It just, it means you’re awesome, you’re awake, you’re alive, you’re activated. But you know, you probably have been judged for that a lot. And you’ve probably judged yourself a ton. And all of the worry, all of the concern all of the swirl, it’s just like the spin cycle of your head. Take a listen some time, and you will see it gives zero. I’m not gonna say the swear word. But you know what I want to say here, about how you’re actually doing and what you need. It’s just swirling and spinning. You know? So when we’re in it, it can be so hard to focus on ourselves. But this is exactly the medicine I’m offering today. You need to focus on yourself. So if you’re struggling, and you have anxiety, anxiety, if you have fear, if you’re upset if you can’t rest, if you you know, you’ve got a big schedule and you’re not getting enough sleep or whatever it is, in the middle of all of your upset and worry and concern and the meaninglessness. Anybody feeling like life can feel so meaningless, so pointless? What’s the point? I don’t care if you have to sit down 100 times today and have yourself I want you to do it. I want you to put physical contact on yourself on your body. And just say hello, hello.
I’m here with you. I know. This is big. It’s big. You know, people don’t always get why we’re like this. I can’t even tell you. It’s like a Rolodex. Do you remember Rolodex right now I could scroll through a Rolodex, how many people in my life have said, You’re an odd bird. You’re a weird one. You don’t walk on eggshells to you the other day somebody said you’re very direct person. Like, all of the ways somebody can tell you, you’re difficult or challenging or weird or wrong. And, you know, friends years. And I mean years. Did the cicadas just kick up? It’s like the chorus got louder here. This is where we’re gonna say the big thing in the podcast. My chorus of cicadas just got a little louder. For years. I was in different stages with this. And I wonder if it corresponds to the stages of grief. You know, Elisabeth Kubler Ross’s amazing work on the five stages of grief. Yes. Let’s pull that list up.
Here we go.
Denial is the first one. You know where you’re like, I can’t believe they just said I was difficult. I can’t believe they told me I’m challenging. If you’ve been listening for a while, you know, my mom, I told you this before, but my mom would say her thing was when she would get frustrated with me, she would point to your her head and say there’s something wrong with your head Robin. And so you go around like I can’t believe they said that I can’t believe they said that I can’t believe denial, or you just deny, like what a terrible mothering skill that was, you know, you can deny yourself that too. You can be angry, you can stay in a place of anger. And you know, I know this place in me where you remember something for a kajillion years, and you don’t advance at all You stay in your anger. Then you stay in your bargaining. You go through the bargaining phase, if only I could change who I am. If only I could change who I am, if only I could change the way I am. I have to change this dynamic and you ended up scrutinizing yourself to the point that you apologize for things you should never have apologize for. Whatever happened for you and this other person, you know it, it was much bigger than just you, you know, bargaining If only I could make this better if only you know Then you get into this place where it’s depressing.
where you’re depressed, I can’t, this is how I am. Why am I like this? It’s so sad. It’s so. And hopefully you come to a place of acceptance you accept, this is who I am people I care deeply. I care deeply about the energy. I care deeply about the stuff you say the way you’re acting. And you could also say you’re easily disturbed. But let’s say you’re caring deeply, you care deeply, you care deeply about your meaning, your purpose, those of you who haven’t had a lot of work, and you’d like to be working more, you care deeply about feeling like you are doing something important. You know, you bet you’re contributing whenever you started, you care deeply. So acceptance is where we all want to get to that. We want to be committed to our own hearts, not codependent with the energy out there. up that’s coming in out there. It’s so easy for all of this to mingle together. But um, I just, you know, I really want to say that today. There is nothing wrong with you. You are good. In fact, you’re everything this world needs right now. Have you seen the state of the world these days? Like how literally screwed up things are? The world needs people like you in it. Direct, outspoken. Yeah, sometimes, you know, we could have said it better. We need people like this to keep calling it out. So do not abandon your own heart. Please don’t abandon your heart. How are you going to hang in there with yourself? That’s my question. Because you can be in the spin about things that do not matter. It actually doesn’t matter if so and so is pissed off at you. It actually doesn’t matter. Today, if your kids are screwed up by the thing you said to them today, it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t. It actually doesn’t matter. If you’re not working today.
Has anything happened to you? Because you’re not working today? Like physically happened to you literally happened to you? Yeah, it doesn’t matter. Today, what does matter that you stay present with yourself that you matter to yourself, that you’re holding your own hand. I’ve been saying this for the last many episodes, holding your own hand, hold your hand. So many of you here are people who help other people, you’re kind of like teachers in the world, your mentors, your world changers in your way you impact change. You know, maybe you don’t have that moment right now where you’re judging yourself you are. If you’re here, that’s part of who you are. You need to learn how to hold your own hand and stay present with how it’s feeling to be you with everything that’s going on in your life and the world. Like, you need to learn how to do that. Even more than you’re worried about your kids or how so and so is going to take this when you say it need to care more about how you feel than taking care of everyone else. And that’s just how it is. period you know, this is the thing that we’ve never really been taught to do. We’re learning to do it through hard knocks through people shaming us. Wow. Your dirt Are you forget how they started to be direct much. Like what does that even mean? Or an x? Long time ago and exes family member said to me you don’t walk on eggshells Do you? But you know it’s not a compliment. Boom. People say that it hurts. But you can be in denial about that you can be bargaining. With these people, you can learn your pithy quotes and your bravado, you can fake it till you make it all this crap we’ve learned to do, you know, it’s stupid things people say to you, but you know, we shouldn’t carry it around and be upset about it. What we should do is accept that us being naturally ourselves is going to ruffle some feathers. And that is exactly what the world needs. If you give a shit about your purpose in this world, you should care about making significant change and impacting the world, or your corner of it in a positive way. That is your purpose, to share what you’re learning in the world and with the world and helping other people take something away that makes it better to so you know, hold your hand this week, stay present with how it’s feeling to be you. and advance the narrative a little bit. acceptance is the final stage of grief. And it’s okay to grieve that you are, you know, like it’s you. You are this. This is who you are. Has anyone ever called you intense? Oh, yeah. I have been called intense a lot. I actually love being intense. I accept that I am intense. And you know, where my freedom really came in. Very recently, when I understood that I need to be around people who care deeply just like me. And I need to stop being around people. or lessen my exposure to people who have a limited capacity to care deeply. I’m not trying to talk in code. I’m just so done with being upset about people in my life who seem like they’ve been pissed. I love that word. pissed. Like they have zero
they don’t care. Yeah, I’m gonna when you accept how things are exactly as they are, you accept to how it is let them be how they are. You are free to accept that you’re not like that. You don’t have to be like that. You’re not required to be like that. You know? I wonder how many of us would raise our hands when I if I could look at you and ask this like, is your spiritual story that you need to learn how to be more even keeled, more neutral? To have no emotion to not be too high or too low? To not be volatile? Anybody out there been called volatile to get worked up to get intense about things. Yeah. Me on my hands in the air right now. My hands in the air right now. I am so done with new drawl. bland, Piff people. And I’m it’s not for me, you are free. And it’s not for me. I need to be with people who get jazzed up about stuff juicy, they’re excited. They’re alive. You know, their face moves, they smile. They care deeply. And even if they get worked up. It’s fine. I want to hear what’s exciting, what’s frustrating. What’s nerving about stuff? I want to know. I want to know, you know, people who are like I couldn’t stop thinking about what happened or whatever. Yeah. Those are my people. And in fact going back to volatile, I was talking to a friend this morning in session and we were talking about being volatile people. As a kid I was a very volatile kid. suspended in high school, usually speaking up speaking out, things like that. But you know, sometimes I didn’t go to school, either. I skipped school a lot. A lot of us skipped school a lot Didn’t we did not show up to school. I know a lot of you who didn’t go to school and had to have a letter so you could graduate. That happened to me too. You know,
we were, we were,
what would it have been like to have a different experience with it to come away? Feeling like being taught having a mentor who said, you know, there’s big feelings in you like,
there’s a big swing in you, it’s a creative tendency, actually. And it’s okay. It’s part of who you are. And I want to help you harvest some of this energy and learn to channel it and helped us wouldn’t. That would have been so amazing. In my case, because my family had a history of bipolar disorder, people in my family had depression and there was addiction stuff going on. It’s like, it got labeled a bad thing for me, I got labeled early with these kinds of labels that you just feel like an outcast, a weirdo, the wrong one, the bad one. And so you know, it’s alright, if you care deeply. It’s okay. If you’re passionate, if you’re intense. We can help ourselves today, no matter how long it’s been, no matter how long this has gone on, no matter how old you are. It’s never too late to embrace who you are, and love yourself. And give yourself the love you need now, yeah, you can be volatile. accept yourself as that. Even if nobody else gets you. That’s the kind of thing you hear about people who end up being the most amazing world leaders, poets, artists, musicians, chefs, or just that one super cool person at the party. Who doesn’t do anything. You know, you don’t have to amount to something that the ego reveres, right. You don’t. Don’t let yourself be so busy shaming yourself while you’re trying to get all spiritual on the situation that you miss. This day exists for you bow, this is your beautiful life, and today counts, and you matter. And you matter the most.
what do you need today to be okay with yourself? And can you do it? Will you do it? Will you love yourself? I vote yes, yes. And yes. And you know what, honestly, that felt so powerful. I want to leave it there.
Let’s all hit rewind, and listen again, maybe later this week, and receive the medicine. And here’s what i would love. If you see my posts somewhere. I usually post this episode to Facebook and Instagram and you feel brave. You know, sometimes you have to be brave. I want to know what this connected for you. I want to know what you’re walking through.
I want to know
a little more about what’s going on for you. Where are the next steps for you? And if I can help, I’ll be there. You know, this is what I love. I love talking about these things. And you know, in the meanwhile I’ll be here sipping my coffee, my hot chocolate. I also have some toast here.
We could have some toasts.
Just a little toast and olive oil and sea salt.
Course now you have to wait for me to finish join. Oh my god. Friends. What if you never had to apologize for who you work and what if on your next sleepless night or your next morning where you wake up and you go,
the thoughts started hitting you. What if you knew how to handle it? And it was the real deal. Love. What if it was calm in there, as the mind was spinning out of control. This is where we’re going. Those of you riding with me this is the journey we’re on and so many of you are telling You hear the shift? Well, I hear it in you, too. So this is the journey we’re on. Remember to hold your own hand this week, and stay present with how it’s feeling to be you. Take care of what you need. Honor yourself. Yeah. And you know, always if you liked this episode, please share it, help us get the word out, help us, us help our posse grow. Help people already searching for this kind of support. To find it more easily. I appreciate that. Always. You can leave a review. You can repost my post or you can make a new one, share it from your, wherever you’re listening. Write something cool. I suggest you write something cool. And, you know, I’m always here if you if this is the right time. Let’s meet and talk about it. In the session, I also offer a sliding scale if that works better for you at this time. You know, so many of us are having a new financial experience. And so, you know, there’s something here for everybody today. All right, beloved, I’m heading back into Healing Sessions. Now I’m going to finish my toast. And I will be here loving myself and loving you. Yeah. I love you, boo. I care about you. I care about this journey. So much. Well, this has been me Robin Hart, sparkler. halat and I’m going to see here again next time. Bye.
Life is very short. Make the very most of it you are a
Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo. We are here to shine and shine bright. You our
is precious. You so shine like you know, rock it like you mean?
You really, really name
and name it.
You are you are you thank you. Thank you.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
❤ Hello, sweet friend! I am available to work with you privately in session long-distance or in-person in Arlington Heights, IL learn more about working with me privately here. Did you know you can sign up to receive weekly inspiration straight to your inbox? Subscribe to my emails here. Always, if I can help, write to me here. Sending you love and peace! ❤