What do you do about the people who don’t treat you right?
How do we not go to kookytown getting so upset and handle what we need to handle without throwing ourselves under the bus?
In this episode, I’m talking about all the scenarios–from strangers to friends to family members, and share ideas on what to do with your upset and how to not let it ruin your day.
Today’s inspiration comes from Mr. Joel Osteen who gave me one of the best quotes ever.
This week’s letter comes from a friend who’s just learned that a loved one has cancer and wonders how to be supportive and process her grief at the same time.
Listen here or wherever you enjoy podcasts 🙂
My session notes are below 😍😘💖
Episode 35: WTF, Celebrated, #sendyourlove
My notes from today’s episode:
How do we not go to Kookytown getting so upset about the things we need to handle? And how do we not take it so personally?
How do we not throw ourselves under the bus in familiar old frustrating events, or judge ourselves later, or over-analyze our behavior?
You basically have two choices, you can get in there and tangle with this person or you can say peace out!
I’ve been there too – I love those times when we realize we ride together, we’ve been through similar things and that means we are never alone, never the only ones.
Lots of our stressy upset with peeps has to do with our family of origin.
Some of these happenings are repeats of other times and you’re being given a new opportunity to do a different move.
Perhaps you’ve had a history of toxic care and so anyone behaving rudely towards you is a challenge to be around and the energy in situations like this can leave you feeling frustrated, helpless, exasperated, or angry. But there’s an intensity here you might recognize that’s way too big for this situation. That’s the sign that this is connected to your past.
You matter. Your needs matter.
How do we handle boundaries with people who don’t treat you well? Sometimes it just comes down to you not putting yourself in situations like that. Move along.
If you’ve had a history where you were treated like you were the difficult one, even though we know it was the other way around, you will have some reverberations running through your body and you might feel bad about setting boundaries. It’s OK.
Perhaps you were teased for trying to stand up.
You were given grief for stating your needs.
Accused of being difficult.
All for just being you.
OF COURSE, you will feel scared as you stand up for yourself!
But at some point we come to the place where we say, I am willing to risk my significance and allow myself to have what I need and move away from what isn’t helping me but hurting me.
I am willing to love myself more than I am to stay afraid and I’m gonna get better and better at this, honoring myself, loving myself, doing what I need to do to take care of me.
We have to know how much we matter how loved we are how precious we are and that everything that is still seeking to be healed within us — notice I didn’t say everything that’s wrong with us– I said everything that’s seeking to be healed within us, is coming forward asking us to love it and care for it.
We’ve lived through stuff – we know what we need
If you’re going to crazy town in your upset about what someone else is saying to you doing to you whatever it is, you’ve got a pattern there, a situation there, something asking to be revealed and healed.
The upset is saying, please, this is an issue for you – please sit down and take a look.
Maybe you will make a new policy:
- I am going to spend some time getting to know how I am feeling, what’s going on, I am going to sit with this – sit with the feelings, be present with what’s coming up.
- For a time, I am going to remove myself from situations which feel like they’re toxic to me.
Don’t be hard on yourself. It’s healthy to love yourself and be kind to yourself.
Nobody needs to get it but you, but we need to trust that we’re okay and not weirdos.
Stay awake to victim energy be willing to move forward anyway.
Normal in my world is to have emotions.
Love yourself and allow yourself to process your feelings.
Say to yourself: I am here to love you through this and nobody needs to get it but you.
I remind myself often that it doesn’t make me weird or bad, either. But because my family told me this growing up, I might still feel confused. In so many ways that’s why I am a lightsparkler… I am here to help us see we are better than awesome, we are the best there is. It doesn’t mean there won’t be tough days, doesn’t mean we won’t be upset. And because we understand that and it’s ok we are going to let ourselves have time and space to process without being mean to ourselves without being hard on ourselves without being critical “why are you so upset! This is stupid! You should not be feeling this way! This is why you’re a loser!”
Bodies will feel shaky as we go to stand up for ourselves for having our needs and wants.
It’s gonna feel like you’re in trouble
Use gentle inquiry to plan what you do next time.
The stuff that comes up on our path is here to help us get free
Show references below
⭐A Course in Miracles Quotes:
What you value, you will keep. A Course in Miracles – Chapter 16 – VI. The Bridge to the Real World
⭐Related links for this episode:
⭐Books mentioned in this episode:
You might enjoy the Course in Miracles practices I offer here.
⭐Movies mentioned in this episode:
Thank you for listening, may it serve you!
Hugs and love,
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🎧 Episode 35: When it’s one WTF too many. How do we not go to Kookytown with the rest of them? Stay off the bus, and not throw ourselves under it 😜This episode is about handling situations which bring old, frustrating energies back to us. We’ll talk about handling the situations without the usual guilt and self-doubt after. 💖 Plus, I manage to put Joel Osteen, The Matrix, and Thich Nhat Hanh in the same episode. And Robins singing! Also my whacky phone calls this week. This week’s letter is from a friend who’s wondering how to send love, not worries to a loved one with cancer. All this and more! Let’s grab a cuppa yum yum and meet here. Link in bio for the full episode on iTunes, Spotify, Google Podcasts, or wherever you enjoy listening Episode 35: WTF, Celebrated, #sendyourlove http://robinhallett.libsyn.com/episode-35-wtf-celebrated-sendyourlove #teawithrobin @robinhallett